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These changes can have profound results, enabling all team members, male and female, to contribute to their full potential.Ī senior manager is asked to give up an executive committee seat because the CEO wants to shrink the group’s size and plans to retain only “the most engaged” members. Women should master the “pre-meeting,” connecting with colleagues to test ideas and gather support come to meetings armed with cogent comments and questions that can move the conversation forward keep an even keel, speaking in measured tones and being careful not to signal frustration through sarcasm or curtness and move past confrontation without taking it personally.īosses can also help ensure that women’s voices are heard, by providing direct feedback about meeting behavior, inviting more women to the table, and proactively pulling women into the conversation. Their male counterparts perceive a problem, but they tend to dismiss it as resulting from timidity, defensiveness, lack of focus, or excessive emotion.ĭrawing on interviews, surveys, and decades of work as leadership coaches, the authors suggest steps women can take to feel more comfortable and become more effective. Some say their voices are drowned out others can’t find a way into the conversation at all. So if the voice in your head castigates the voice coming out of a recording device, it’s probably your inner critic overreacting – and you’re judging yourself a bit too harshly.Even at the highest levels of organizations, many otherwise dynamic women struggle in meetings. The researchers found that patients, across the board, tended to more negatively rate the quality of their recorded voice compared with the objective assessments of clinicians. They also had clinicians rate the voices. Instead, we’re simply more used to hearing ourselves sound a certain way.Ī study published in 2005 had patients with voice problems rate their own voices when presented with recordings of them. Suddenly you realize other people have been hearing something else all along.Įven though we may actually sound more like our recorded voice to others, I think the reason so many of us squirm upon hearing it is not that the recorded voice is necessarily worse than our perceived voice. Because your voice is unique and an important component of self-identity, this mismatch can be jarring. It really is a new voice – one that exposes a difference between your self-perception and reality. There’s a second reason hearing a recording of your voice can be so disconcerting. The recorded voice, in comparison, can sound thinner and higher pitched, which many find cringeworthy. When you hear your own voice when you speak, it’s due to a blend of both external and internal conduction, and internal bone conduction appears to boost the lower frequencies.įor this reason, people generally perceive their voice as deeper and richer when they speak. While some of the sound is transmitted through air conduction, much of the sound is internally conducted directly through your skull bones. However, when you speak, the sound from your voice reaches the inner ear in a different way. These bones then transmit the sound vibrations to the cochlea, which stimulates nerve axons that send the auditory signal to the brain. When listening to a recording of your voice, the sound travels through the air and into your ears – what’s referred to as “ air conduction.” The sound energy vibrates the ear drum and small ear bones. The discomfort we have over hearing our voices in audio recordings is probably due to a mix of physiology and psychology.įor one, the sound from an audio recording is transmitted differently to your brain than the sound generated when you speak.
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Some become so unsettled they refuse outright to listen to the recording – much less go over the subtle changes I want to highlight.